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Spike Milligan Quotes

Spike Milligan was a popular comedian who literally lit the 19th century. To his friends and family, he was known as Terence Alan “Spike” Milligan KBE. Besides comedy, he was a talented writer and actor. He was born and raised in India but spent most of his professional life in the United Kingdom. Spike Milligan quotes always had ripple effects and made him to be regarded as Britain’s funniest comic. In some of Spike Milligan quotes, he would frequently joke that all men were ‘cremated’ equally. Spike Milligan quotes were also rich in word play. His quotes are the cause of so much laughter.

Spike Milligan Quotes

  • And God said, ‘Let there be light’ and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected.

  •  For ten years Caesar ruled with an iron hand. Then with a wooden foot, and finally with a piece of string.

  •  I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.Spike Milligan Quotes

  •  A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.

  •  All I ask is the chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.Spike Milligan Quotes

  •  I can speak Esperanto like a native.

  •  My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.

  •  How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.

  •  I’m not afraid of dying I just don’t want to be there when it happens.Spike Milligan Quotes

  •  It was a perfect marriage. She didn’t want to and he couldn’t.

  •  Money can’t buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.Spike Milligan Quotes

  •  I thought I’d begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.

  •  Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it’s all in perfect working order.

  •  Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.

  •  Money couldn’t buy friends, but you got a better class of enemy.

  •  I shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove it.Spike Milligan Quotes

  •  I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe’s singing until somebody told me that it wasn’t a joke.

  •  It’s all in the mind, you know.

  •  I’m a hero with coward’s legs.

  •  Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?

  •  Here lies one whose name was writ in water.

  •  Poetry should be great and unobtrusive, a thing which enters into one’s soul, and does not startle it or amaze it with itself, but with its subject.

  •  I would sooner fail than not be among the greatest.

  •  You speak of Lord Byron and me; there is this great difference between us. He describes what he sees I describe what I imagine. Mine is the hardest task.

  •  Do you not see how necessary a world of pains and troubles is to school an intelligence and make it a soul?

  •  There is not a fiercer hell than the failure in a great object.Spike Milligan Quotes

  •  With a great poet the sense of Beauty overcomes every other consideration, or rather obliterates all consideration.

  •  Praise or blame has but a momentary effect on the man whose love of beauty in the abstract makes him a severe critic on his own works.

  •  He ne’er is crowned with immortality Who fears to follow where airy voices lead.

  •  Philosophy will clip an angel’s wings.

  •  The Public – a thing I cannot help looking upon as an enemy, and which I cannot address without feelings of hostility.

  •  Much have I traveled in the realms of gold, and many goodly states and kingdoms seen.

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